19. Pain is one of the primary methods the Spirit uses to help me in my transformation.

(Before looking at the questions below, take a few minutes to think about this statement. Invite Jesus to speak to you about what He would like you to notice.) 

How would you describe your tolerance for physical or emotional pain?

How often do you complain about your pain?

How often do you pray that God would take pain from you?

“Have you ever asked God to use your pain to grow you? If not, what might be preventing you from asking Him for this?”

Have you ever experienced good from a painful experience? What was that like?

Can you imagine thanking God for your pain?

Our society has an aversion to pain. It is staggering to consider the energy and the money we spend to avoid it. We buy health insurance, install air conditioning, try new medications, invest in personalized mattresses. We spare no expense to avoid suffering. Our pursuit of comfort is not just an obsession, it is an even deeper part of our personhood. We expect comfort.

We believe we have a right to not suffer or be in pain. This core belief shapes much of our active lives and our relationships with others. It also shapes our relationship with God. We expect God to relieve our suffering.

We cry out to God and become angry when He doesn’t meet our physical need for comfort. And if He doesn’t, we assume our suffering is punishment for something we have done wrong. But if we interpret suffering this way, we are worshiping the wrong god.

We have made comfort our god rather than the Creator, Sustainer, and Savior of our souls. Jesus shows us that suffering is not our enemy. I do not believe that God intentionally brings suffering into our lives. Our human experience creates more than enough suffering without God’s help.

God desires for us to let suffering become a positive force in our transformation. For this to happen, we must first let go of our aversion to suffering and pain and stop running from it or trying to fix it. We can change our attitude so that we understand the potential that suffering has for us. We can embrace it and invite Jesus into our suffering and ask for the guidance and counsel of His Spirit. When we do this, we will find that we benefit and grow from our suffering.

Our suffering, with the Spirit’s help, can produce in us a spiritual fruit that overcomes our physical suffering. We can find contentment amidst unmet expectations and needs. We can find peace instead of conflict. We can find a joy that replaces the unhappiness of pain. The overall result will be growth in our ability to hold deep and healthy relationships with others, God, and ourselves. This is the truth that James speaks of when he says,

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete” (1:2-4, NIV). His words “complete” and “mature” refer to our relational wholeness and health. This fruit happens when we embrace suffering, instead of worshiping comfort.